Got a great suggestion for a blog topic from fellow London Dominatrix Nina Hiss. So I am going to go with it ‘cause what do I know about blog topics? I just like to hurt people and laugh about it…
I am a goth to the core. I was introduced to Korn when I was a teenager and it spiraled Me into rock music. I had always loved music, but rock music just brought Me to a new high.I dabbled in the goth style but was shunned by most people in My life so I stopped in My first year of university. For a few years I was ‘normal’ and just went to rock concerts. But then when I moved into the city I started attending rock bars, I met goths through the rock bars and was completely drawn to their style again. I really embraced it this time and found community and a made family. Music is incredible and how it brings people together, I truly felt this there.
Through the goth scene it was pretty much inevitable to get into the fetish scene – it is basically seamless, well in Toronto anyways. I had friends that went to kink parties and I had really wanted to check it out, though never did. Then I got a boyfriend that was kinky and holy fuck it blew My mind. I basically hadn’t done anything overly kinky before, rough sex sure but that is about it. I also, at the time, didn’t really associate anything as kinky or anything that I fetishized in My past. But. Now. OMG. I just dove in. A latex dress was one of the first things that I bought. (Be sure you read My blog post all about My Love for Latex as I won’t get into that here). Coming from the goth scene, fetish outfits, getting dressed up and partying were already my foundation. So I went to fetish parties any chance I got and I loved it. I basically got to dress up in hot outfits and have My mind opened to kink and the amazing lifestyle that it can give you. The people you meet through the scene are so open minded and expose you to a new way of living. Plus all the fun things you can do, say and feel; I sunk deep into it.
Suddenly I was given the opportunity to work as a Dominatrix and it was a huge surprise for Me, but I seized it. I have learnt so much about Myself through My path in kink. My childhood was filled with performing in dance competitions and owning and showing horses. This instilled exhibitionism, discipline, nurtured My ability to control another and so much more. As I progressed through My career I met whomever I could and experienced everything I could. As much as you want to learn and excel, it is still a process and it does take time. It has been very hard, but good work. It is also extremely rewarding. Kink has given Me so much self awareness and self confidence, it is like a drug for Me. Not even mentioning the kink related skills I have acquired, the skills that I have had to learn as a business owner baffles Me. I am incredibly thankful that kink is accessible, and everyday that I am part of it I am more and more My truest self and that is the best place to be.