Lady Valeska

Ode to the Female Submissive

Nov 10, 2023/ Lady Valeska/ in: Entry, FemDom/ with no comments

Unfortunately even in the FemDom world that tries to preach anti-patriarchal views, male submissives are the focus. Overall I do understand this, as men consume pornography much more than women and pornography is how most of us are exposed to sex and sexual fantasies and then the male focus grows from there. But come on ladies, we are in 2023 now and we are sexual liberated and kinky as fuck! So I wanted to write this blog as a praise and salute to female submissives, to encourage and remind you of your power through submission. I have been seeing a slow incline of female submissives as clients and have had the absolute pleasure to work with more female professional submissives and I couldn’t be a happier Mistress! I think male submissives have much to learn and can be educated on how to be a better submissive from females. As with some of my other blogs I do want to caveat my entry with not having the intention of trying to alienate anyone based on their genitalia or the sex they identify with, whether it be someone that is gender fluid, trans, non binary or similar. These are general terms I am using and don’t mean to offend.


Circling back to one of my first points about the huge lack of healthy female submission representation in BDSM porn. Most porn is created for the male gaze rather than the female gaze and that is something that needs to change. About 50% of the population are female and some studies say that approximately 50% of women are sexually attracted to other women. So I believe there is a large untapped market out there. I will admit that as a professional Mistress I struggle to find a ‘happy medium’ to also include females as a consumer but, comparatively, with it being such a small number of females that I have a sessions with as well as those that buy my clips it isn’t ‘worth it’ to put a large focus on female clients. A large majority of us target our content to men and not women. Our pictures, catch phrases and dialogue are mostly focused on men and male genitalia. And again I will admit that my brand is part of the problem, but I think this is important for us to discuss and analyze and see where we as Mistresses can change and improve. I hope to do more in 2024 and want to be held accountable to it. Plus playing with women is just more fun, as I will detail next.


From my experience female submissives far exceed in skill and demeanor than their male counterparts. I tend to feel a much deeper connection when I play with a female submissive than a male submissive. Female submissives tend to be more present in a scene and are more willing and able to surrender themselves completely. Being able to do that is more of an internal skill than something that can be taught and it is such a beautiful thing to witness and be part of as a Mistress. I find it very titillating. Female submissives have a tenderness that is infrequently seen with males. And females are so much less concerned with their vulva than males are with their cocks and it is so refreshing to be around that energy. Female submissives have much better service skills and as a female myself I find they are much more intune with reading my wants and needs as well as my body language in comparison to males. Female submissives communicate much better as well, which is the foundation for a great scene with me as their Mistress. The female body is so much more beautiful than males, and three holes are even better than two to play with! Women give better blow jobs and are way more flexible for more creative fucking positions!  And thankfully females tend to have better hygiene, and most males don’t get pedicures. All of these points make for a very happy Mistress, and I know I am not the only one that feels this way. It is regularly pointed out amongst my fellow Mistresses that a female submissive is ideal and coveted yet scarce. 

So where are you female submissives? Why don’t you come out and play more? I am sure you have sexual fantasies that you are dying to play out and try. Why are Dominatrixes predominantly used by the inferior sex? Your sexual urges and fantasies are valid and should be explored. Everyone knows that females are kinky fuckers and the world of kink is plentiful and vast. There is a Mistress out there for everyone and I can’t wait to play with you

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